My intention when I retired last year from a 34-year career in journalism was to take three months off. After that "vacation" I'd launch into finishing two books I've been dabbling at. Then my husband, Dabney, mentioned this plan to Emily when the two of them ran into each other. Emily sent back a message that her advice was to do no such thing.

Instead, she said, I should give myself ample time to get reacquainted with myself. To hang out, do what I want, do nothing at all if that's what I wanted. Get to know myself as a "retiree" who has this marvelous chance to discover who I am apart from an identity as newspaper reporter and columnist. I could reinvent myself, but only if I wanted to do that. Sooner or later, she said, I'd know how I really wanted to spend my time.

I thought she was nuts to recommend such intentional floating through time. But it turns out she was right. Here's how I knew it: I had a dream in which I was in a large valley filled with people. I was standing on a high hill facing the people wondering what in the world I was going to say to them. Someone said, "It's your turn to speak your truth to the people." "I'm not ready," I said. "You will be," the person predicted.

And I knew then that I needed to take more time before I found the truth I wanted to live and to speak about. Perhaps this story that Emily asked me to write is part of the open truth-telling I so deeply believe in.

For those of you who have great plans for your life in retirement, I've joined Emily in suggesting that you give yourself at least six months, preferably a year or even 18 months, to just be. If your finances permit, don't deny yourself this opportunity. Be yourself. Do what you want to do. Do nothing if that's what you need to do. Give yourself time alone. Your brain will work on revealing to you who you are and what you really value and want to do.

So if you've been wedded to your job, to your hyper-scheduled life, and to your long-range goal-setting, loosen up. You 40, 50 and 60-somethings who think I'm nuts to suggest such a hiatus, I invite you to just consider the possibility of playing awhile. Spend lots of time listening to your gut instinct. It will tell you when you're ready to do whatever it is you want to do.

Dr. Robert N. Butler, CEO of The International Longevity Center, has recently published The Longevity Revolution: The Benefits and Challenges of Living a Long Life. Reviewer Dr. Ken Dychwald says, "Dr. Bob Butler's Longevity Revolution is truly a masterful piece of work. No individual has done more, here in the US - or throughout the world - to raise awareness of the challenges and opportunities, the fears and hopes of our longer lives. Serving as both physician and philosopher, Dr. Butler brilliantly charts the landscape of an increasingly longer-lived 21st century."

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